


Shedding Light

by najaeri



Category: Monsta X (Band)
Genre: Alternate Universe, Alternate Universe - Idols, Cutesy, Fluff, Fluff and Humor, Friendship/Love, Idols, M/M, Romance
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-04-28
Updated: 2020-04-28
Packaged: 2021-03-01 23:40:55
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,618
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23895475
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/najaeri/pseuds/najaeri
Summary: Shownu was going to see his idol for the 90th time in his entire life. He never got tired of listening to his songs or watching him grow as an artist and as a person. He always knew he was just another fan, but that wouldn't stop him from supporting him. After all, he had his life as well; he has friends, a job he loved and plenty of other stuff to do. But he found his best with him and it'll always be that way.
Relationships: Son Hyunwoo | Shownu & Yoo Kihyun, Son Hyunwoo | Shownu/Yoo Kihyun
Kudos: 33





	Shedding Light

**Author's Note:**

> This fanfic was posted in AFF as a YunJae (Yunho x Jaejoong). In AO3, it will be ShowKi (Shownu x Kihyun). All copyrights to me. Thank you!

"Okay Wonho, listen," said the oldest of the two with a very excited boy beside him. "We are going to the concert and we are absolutely getting in the stage to kidnap them, alright?"

"Of course!" said the youngest, clapping like a mad seal while jumping around. "We are meeting our idols, AGAIN!" he screamed in joy while the other laughed.

"Yes, we are!" and they began shouting at the same time.

"Oh my fucking God," they heard outside of their door, shutting up instantly. "Can you please NOT start fangirling? I have FINALS. LAW FINALS MIXED WITH BIOLOGY! DO YOU KNOW HOW FRUSTRATED I AM FOR YOU GUYS TO BE FANGIRLING AROUND? LIKE PLEASE, JUST PLEASE, DON'T. AND IT'S NOT LIKE YOU GUYS ARE FUCKING TEENAGERS? YOU ARE OLD ENOUGH TO BE MY DAD SO PLEASE ACT LIKE A FUCKING ADULT."

"Can you fuck the calm down?" answered the oldest while he opened the door and saw a very frustrated Changkyun with tears on his eyes and two big books on his hand. "We are leaving in like 8 minutes. You'll have peace the entire night."

"He's just jealous," said the middle child, a smile decorating his face. "Since it's not Nightwish..."

"Hold the fuck up," interrupted Changkyun with a very indignant face. "Keep Floor Jansen and her beautiful self outside of this. Both of you are fangirling for a boy group... A FREAKING BOY GROUP THAT DOESN'T EVEN KNOW YOU EXIST."

"I know, I know," replied the oldest with a hand on his forehead, acting like he was about to faint. "Don't say that again! I'm going to die. It's hard enough living with that truth, okay?"

"Okay, Shownu, don't mind him," called Wonho with his belongings already on his back. "We need to leave."

\----

At the venue, they were almost kissing the stage. They were excited and with tears in their eyes. Every time they came, they went, but most of the time they were upstairs. Being the responsible adults they were, bills came first along with common necessities. They did try their very best to handle everything at once; being a 'fangirl' like Changkyun described them, work, do chores, hang out and etc. but their heart will always be here in their teenage age.

Following Soulmates.

It has been more than 11 years following the group itself. They have helped them grow up, face their problems, cry their heart out along with many, many things. Priorities have changed incredibly and they joked about being with them and such, but they knew it's never going to happen and they were completely fine with it. Their minds were in a state where their feet never went beyond Earth. And it was okay.

It was more than okay.

Wonho took out his professional camera, hiding it between his clothes. It was prohibited, but he was never caught. Not only that, but he shared those pictures all over the web. They did have his signature on it and he never tried to establish a fanbase, but it seems that people already knew who he was.

"You better get me a good picture of Kihyun," said Shownu jokingly. Wonho's bias was Minhyuk and he mostly had pictures of him, but he always got amazing shots of the other exclusively for him.

And unlike Wonho did with Minhyuk's pictures, he didn't share them. He let Shownu decide if he wanted to do it or not. The oldest decided not to. He was selfish and he liked to think from time to time that the international artist named Kihyun was his.

Even if he was very far from not.

"You know I always do," he confidently said with a smile spreading. Suddenly, the lights were out and the screams were heard all over the place, including his.

Shortly after, the two artists began to sing to one of their new singles and both of them began to sing with them, their heads moving in unison and forgetting every single worry they had at that time. Then the night was only going to be for Soulmates only. No one else.

No more than thirty minutes later, Kihyun sat down in the middle of the stage. His only company was a piano beside him and a microphone on his hands. He smiled at the crowd filled with white and grey lightsticks and everyone began to scream. He kept smiling until everyone calmed down and he proceeded to talk.

"How's everyone doing?" he heard a big response and laughed afterward, melting the heart of his fans. "I'm glad! This is our last stop before preparing for our comeback, are you guys excited?" the crowd began to scream again, shortly followed by thousands of claps.

"This song is a preview for all of you guys," he confessed, the audience becoming crazy. "You all know that I been having these dreams and you all say it's you, right?" he answered, followed by big laughs. "Well, I decided to convert this dream in a song," were his words before he stood up and walked towards his right. "It's called 'Find You'," he announced, suddenly stopping at Shownu's side.

"Fucking kill me, Wonho," murmured Shownu, his eyes on top of Kihyun's figure. "He's coming this way."

"You better not die or I won't get this beautiful picture of him," answered Wonho, his tone of voice very indifferent. He loved Kihyun's voice and he admires everything he went through, but he did not felt the same way Shownu felt for the other.

It was nerve-wracking seeing such beauty before him. The man was gorgeous from head to toe. His skin was perfect and well-maintained. His greyish-blue hair was the talk of the town and his voice to die for, but that was it. He felt calm around him while Shownu felt his heart beating faster every time he saw the figure coming towards him.

And that's when their eyes connected.

"This song is for you," said Kihyun while bending down, directly meeting Shownu's eyes.

 _Found him,_ he said to himself to then stand up and going straight to the piano again.

"I'm done," confessed Shownu, grabbing his heart with his right hand. "He smiled at me. Wonho, pinch me. This must be a dream."

"He smiles at everyone, Shownu," tried to reason with him but he knew it was to no avail. It was already done.

"This dude is fucking ignoring me. Great," replied to himself the oldest in a murmur, not letting the other know about his feelings. But it was true! Kihyun came to him and smiled. That smile was dedicated to him and nothing would change his mind.

Kihyun placed himself in front of the piano, the microphone he once held out of his hands as he began to immerse completely in the song. It has been years of weird dreams that he never shared with everyone. Only Minhyuk knew. Then, he started to twitch them so his fans could share their opinions and out of millions, only one stuck out for him:

_'Maybe he's the one. Perhaps that person that has been following you ever since is your one and only. After all, it doesn't matter how famous you are or how apart you are, you'll reunite. Maybe in a different life, maybe in this one; one will never know, but it's sure. We were born to be with someone and even if we change and search for a while, we will never feel the way we feel with that person. It's indescribable; almost like non-existent magic. Something out of this world. Something you won't explain in words, but that you'll be able to express with actions. That's when you know it's him.'_

The songwriter closed his eyes and began to sing:

_I’m still recollecting my memories_

_I have been hovering around here for a long time_

_After I let you go, being able to hear your voice_

_When I stay still and close my eyes, I can feel it clearly_

_Your scent, the sound of your breathing, down to your tiny smiles_

_You embraced me, who had been frozen up_

_Every day, every day, every day I miss you till I get tired and go to sleep_

_Tomorrow, tomorrow, tomorrow, will I get to see you?_

_In my memories, you are like a dream I wish to bring back_

_Beneath the dark skies, when I cannot see a thing_

_I have the courage to run off away to anywhere_

_You reach out your hand to me, who was filled only with wounds_

_Putting the breath back in me who was dying_

_You who gifted me with the world again_

_Even when we’re apart I believe that we are together babe_

_Now I’ll look over you so that you won’t be lonely_

_Where you at? Here I am We will meet again_

_You who gave me a gift I cannot erase_

_In the distance between us that has grown wider_

_In the leftover image of you that I cannot erase_

_Clear and vivid dream, I’m also like crazy today_

_You keep on hoping, someday we’ll meet again_

_I hope that my sincerity will open up a path to you_

_My every day spent missing you,_

_until I finally reach the place where you are_

_I won’t stop, I will promise you_

_Some time, no matter where you are, I’ll definitely find you_

_I’ll definitely hug you the way just like you had wished for_

_Wait for me I’ll find you Like a miracle I’ll find you_

_Will you let me live in a dream that is you forever?._

When the last keystroked his fingers, the crowd exploded. He smiled to himself, carefully looking as to where Shownu was, his smile increasing.

After a couple of more songs with his partner, the concert went to an interlude, giving people a break to go to the bathroom, buy something to drink or just chat in general. For him, it was still chaotic. The coordinators were all over him re-doing his makeup and choosing his wardrobe for the next segment. He briefly looked at his best friend and he caught the look, taking his phone out immediately to text him.

_From: Minjokster_

_To: Killervoice_

_I know that look. What happened?_

Kihyun sighed.

_To: Minjokster_

_From: Killervoice_

_Remember what I told you about this guy that has been appearing on my dreams? You might think I'm crazy. I mean, nothing new, right? But… I found him. He's my fan._

Minhyuk almost choke on his water and Kihyun giggled to himself, waiting for his response.

_From: Minjokster_

_To: Killervoice_

_You mean Havana?_

_To: Minjokster_

_From: Killervoice_

_Yes…_

_From: Minjokster_

_To: Killervoice_

_Aren't you doing anything, then?_

_To: Minjokster_

_From: Killervoice_

_I don't know. Help me?_

Kihyun sighed in desperation, trying to not ruffle his hair. He always did that when he felt there was no end. Only frustration was left.

_From: Minjokster_

_To: Killervoice_

_Leave it to me._

And Kihyun looked at his partner, being greeted with a wink and a reassuring smile.

+++

"HOW ARE YOU GUYS FEELING TODAY?!" Minhyuk screamed at the public, while they enthusiastically responded with a firm 'good' at him. "We actually never do this at concerts, but Kihyun and I decided to choose one lucky fan to go backstage with us," the audience exploded, followed by screams of 'Minhyuk, I love you!' 'Kihyun, chose me!' 'For God's sake, I'll die!' so on and so forth. The singer laughed against the microphone, droplets of sweats falling from his face. "Kihyun will choose him personally. You guys know I hate touching people, ew," he admitted while people laughed. It was not far from the truth. He loved his fans but hated fan interactions. He just hated germs in general. He barely could stand his makeup artists and coordinators. He made them wash their hands before actually touching him or his face. He has become better, but it still grosses him out.

Kihyun smiled, knowing beyond the reason. He was nervous, hell he was! He just saw the man he has been dreaming of is, and it is his fan. How could he not be? What if expectations fall? What if he wasn't actually the one? He had so many thoughts bombarding his head, but he tossed them away. He began to walk straight to Shownu and with security help, he went to the barricade. The fans began to push it, trying to get a hold of him but he only had eyes for Shownu.

He smiled at him and Shownu went into shock, not knowing how to respond.

"It's him," he whispered to one of the guards. He wanted to go himself, but that was a death wish. The guards went to immediately grab Shownu, followed by a gasp from his brother and a squeal that he was chosen. Shownu didn't have time to react, the flashes following him everywhere.

Step by step he took the stairs until he was on the stage for the first time with his idols. He saw both of them smiling to him and he swore he briefly felt Kihyun's hand against his.

But the only thing he could do was a bow.

He didn't speak a single word.

And then, all that happened became gibberish to his brain. They placed him in a room, told him to wait approximately 30 minutes. He had a TV where he could enjoy the show until his idols came, but he wasn't paying attention. They even asked him if he wanted water and he stuttered. He was so nervous and he didn't know what to expect.

He was not processing that out of thousands, he was chosen.

"I need someone to pinch me. If I do it myself, it's not going to work," he whispered to himself, not clearly comprehending his situation.

With his clouded and troubled mind, the 30 minutes passed and he heard the door opening behind him. He didn't dare to look who it was, but the room became full all of the sudden. There were 5 people including his idols and he was in the middle. It looked like a scene coming out from the police station or one of those FBI shows he liked to watch from time to time.

Shownu gulped, not sure what to say.

"Hi," said Kihyun, his whole body drenched in sweat. It was hard for Shownu not to look at his beauty or to not be nervous, but he thanked the Heavens' his job was in Child Welfare and his skin was incredibly thick in situations like this. His mind was almost like a brain fart; he has never met Kihyun in person. He was only an artist and he was his fan. Nothing more, nothing else. "I don't know what to say..." were his last words before looking at Minhyuk for comfort.

"He's too nervous, don't mind him," talked Minhyuk, a smile covering his face. He was covered in droplets of saltwater as well, but he had a small towel with him. "This might sound harsh but whatever happens here, needs to stay. These are Kihyun's close friends."

He nodded, bowing at them as a sign of respect. Most of them were smiling except for a girl. She looked younger than Changkyun, but he knew her. He wasn't a fan of her girl group, but she was the youngest and seemed the most serious one out of the group.

"So you are Kihyun's Havana," he heard the girl say. He looked at her like she was talking to an alien, but she suddenly smirked, letting her friends explain her words.

"Kihyun named you his Havana," said another guy, who's named he didn't catch right, but he was almost as beautiful as Kihyun. And he meant almost not because he wasn't beautiful, but because to his eyes, no one was as perfect as Yoo Kihyun.

"Havana?" he asked, his brain trying to not panic. Maybe they were confusing him. That clearly sounded like a girl's name and as far as he knew, he didn't look like a girl. Heck, some people even confused him as straight and he was very damn gay.

"It's just a code we used to identify you since we didn't have your name," he explained, a smirk decorating his face. "My name is Chae Hyungwon," he introduced himself while extending his hand. Shownu grabbed it, accepting his greetings.

"I'm Lee Jooheon," said the other one, extending his arm as well.

"I'm Song Woo Gi, but you can call me Yuqi. That's my stage name," she said, greeting him after Jooheon finished.

"And I'm Lee Minhyuk, but I'm pretty sure you know my name," he said followed by a laugh. Shownu half-smiled, still not understanding why he was there and why Kihyun gave him that name.

"We were only here to introduce ourselves," began to explain Minhyuk. "Kihyun wanted us to meet you. Since you are his fan, I'm pretty sure you know that he has been having weird dreams and has basically let everyone know, right?" Shownu nodded, affirming his remarks.

"Well, those dreams are about you," he said and the fan almost choked on his saliva.

What? His idol dreaming about him? It needs to be a fucking dream. He really needed someone to pinch him or smack him in the head real hard.

Nothing was making sense.

Was there a hidden camera somewhere?

"It might sound weird," continued Yuqi. "But the way he described you was exactly the way I imagined you. We all thought he was crazy but then he drew you and it became a little bit less crazy and time passed. And now that you are here, it's living proof," she finished, a smile decorating her face while she looked at the wall clock. "Guys, your concert needs to begin in five minutes. Why don't we leave these two alone?"

Everyone nodded and left the room, leaving Shownu and Kihyun alone.

The awkward silence filled the whole room. Neither dared to talk. They absolutely didn't know what to say, even though they had a lot of questions surrounding their heads.

"I am--" they said at the same time, followed by a laugh.

"I guess I never heard your name," said Kihyun, biting his lips afterward. He imagined the other was nervous but he looked so peaceful he actually envied him.

But oh, how he loved him.

It might sound crazy, but ever since he invaded his mind, he thought of him every day, every night without stop. He was embezzled.

"Son Hyunwoo," he said with a smile decorating his face. "My name is Son Hyunwoo, but I also have Shownu as my nickname, and I’m the luckiest fan in the entire universe."

"I should consider myself lucky..." said Kihyun following his train of thought. "Part as of why I have been doing concerts it's because of you. I didn't know you were a fan and with my limited time, I couldn't find you in social media. And asking for a private investigator would be too troublesome, so this way my way of trying to get a hold of you. Does it sound stupid? I didn't even know you were my fan until today."

"I… don't know what to say," was his response, his eyes connecting with his. "Right now, I think I'm dreaming. I need someone to kick me in the balls and make me wake up. How come you, a great artist with millions of fans, tried to find me? How come you, with so many people wanting to be with you in different forms with famous friends, was looking for a commoner like me?"

"What if I kiss you?" he said all of the sudden, startling the other. "Maybe that way you'll wake up. Perhaps with that, you'll understand why it's you and not another."

_Oh my fucking God. Yes. Yess. Kiss me until I have no lips left. Kiss me for eternity. You know what? Make me yours. Doesn't fucking matter if I become a bottom with you. Mess with my heart. I can fix it later. Fuck this life. Just do it._

"Well, I'm available," were his words while his own self inside did a big facepalm.

And Kihyun kissed him. It was brief, like a soft peck in the middle of the ocean, but it was enough.

"Wait for me here, okay?"

Shownu nodded, no words coming out from his mouth.

All he thought the entire hour and a half left was that goddamned kiss.

At the end, when the concert finished with two encores, he saw Kihyun coming to the room again with a smile on his face.

"We took your friend?" he said, but it sounded more like a question. "And he's talking with Minhyuk right now. It seems like it his bias."

"It is," he simply said, tempting to kiss him again. Those lips were calling him ever since he entered and he did it without caring. He took the back of his head and kissed him again. This time, it was rougher but gentle at the same time. He was trying to open the other's mind, heart, and soul, and Kihyun willingly let him in, their tongues melting with each other.

After 3 minutes of trying to hold the air, they separated with a big smile on their faces.

"I can't still believe this shit," he said, his hand caressing Kihyun's locks.

"I have plenty of time to demonstrate to you. But tonight, I need to meet my dreams. I need to meet you and I need your love. Are you ready for everything?"

"I am," he said, feeling the singer's hand intertwined with his. "I am."


End file.
